Monday, August 06, 2007

Eerie calm



I am sort of dizzy with inactivity and boredom, waiting for the next thing to do. I am also lousy at the reins, staying up late sort of hovering around the internet like someone might invite me in to write. Instead of sleeping I close my eyes and hold still until I am hypnotized. It is fake sleep. I have been fakesleeping for the last few years. Occasionally I fail at fakesleeping and fall arealsleep.

This is the last official night of hypnotic sleep faking I will spend in this little cabin. Partly packed, partly confused, wholly mystified. If it weren't for sweeping changes I might be slightly insane with the inability to run. I probably should be working on my resume but the idea is so deeply distasteful at the moment it makes me shudder. OH GOD NO, DON'T MAKE ME DO IT. I don't even know where to start.

In the morning. Thats where.

I take it back. Not being able to run will, sooner then later make me wildly insane and its a damn good thing we are moving to a bigger house where I can find my own floor to slam doors and think nasty thoughts and whimper cry over a stupid little swollen ankle. It is a good thing there are Very Pressing Matters at hand to distract me.

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